we have officially mastered the walk of shame
I'm trapped in whichever ring of hell is populated by inbred yokels and type 2 diabetes.
I'm 90% sure a girl here is wearing a bra strap as a headband.
dude wearing that thong all day was not worth the 7 bucks
Well anything after a French guy would have been a disappointment. But I'm fairly certain he was just trying to masturbate into me.
And then he tried to clean the throw up off my pants with 409
Can I interview you during sex or would that be weird?
There something about a girl that pirates lemonade off a restaurant fountain as a mixer that I find intriguing.
But, if I start dating you brother, I can't talk to you about the sex anymore!! Like... Can we talk about it anonymously?! I just won't use his name.
There's a guy running dressed as a bunny toward your house.
In honor of Super Tuesday, we should have the sex tonight.
Is this because I accidentally peed on you?
I'm literally the definition of crunk, sunburnt, and dehydrated. I'm going to die tomorrow.
In my life time, I want nothing more than to get a blow job while watching Space Jam.
You got up in the middle of a sentence, puked, came out and poured another glass of wine and continued your story.
Randomize
