we were taking shots of hot tequila, which is even worse than it sounds
Bisexual people are plain selfish.
I still can't believe I found a dildo in my ceiling today.
It's like you don't even want to get drunk with me everyday, anymore.
Just did a slip and slide down a five story staircase in my dorm. Being an engineer is fucking awesome
my mom found me passed out in the kitchen floor with the Brita pitcher.. Happy Mothers Day
I think having a vagina should be considered a skill, give me a break.
I'm missing a sock, a boot, and antlers. We need to get on that.
Finals drinking + forgeting you had to take your ambien because you work at 6am mid paper= drunk logic which then entails going on a "detox" run. Puking your guts put in the field house bushes while some random guy says to you "its okay. We're marching on."
I wanna just rip ass and see his reaction but i bet itd be better to shatter that illusion when hes drunk
He should just accept that I want his dick and his friendship. Can't he understand that I don't do emotions?
While having sex, a German accent isn't sexy.
"The More You Know"
Too much dab too little lung dying šµšµšµ
His acid is intense dude. I was just over at his place laughing about the hole in the wall I was convinced was a cat
"suitors" is just a nice way of her saying "the guys i'm fucking"
Randomize
