playing new game: drink everytime u see someone at the beach with a tramp stamp, double if u guess it before u see it, triple for male tramp stamps
warning: blackouts possible when playing in ocean city or anywhere in new jersey
I like one night stands...theyre like crushes for big kids
you grabbed his arm with one hand and the bottle of smirnoff with the other and headed off to your room you were on a mission
For my 21st birthday, I require a kiddy pool filled with vodka. Make it so.
Going to.goingto.gtoing to DIE DIE DIEEEE......i feel like everyeone impotrant in my life like MLK is judging me.... saddd day
I woke up smelling like the ciroc you tried pouring into my mouth last night. I think my clothes are still soaked
You need to stop blackout tweeting at him to have sex with you on the roof of your dorm. He doesn't even have a twitter.
I got laughed at by a homeless guy in a Daniel Boone hat. I have no clue what this means for my day
But the drunk streaking fizzled when one of jake's friends took a piss while running with a massive erection.
I'm making a date with someone on Playstation Home. That's how my sex life is going right now.
8 stitches. Next time I decide to twerk while doing a keg stand, stop me.
I don't know about this Sanders guy after all. I'm voting for MYSTERY BABYLON, WHORE OF ALL THE EARTH
Hillary?
AND I NEED A VIKING FUNERAL OR MY GHOST ASS WILL SAUNTER ON OVER AND CASTRATE HIM FOR TECHNICALLY MURDERING ME
Anyone who does not consider cereal and wine as a balanced breakfast needs to leave immediately.
I just realized I'm not wearing clothes. I think my pants may be in the kitchen but I have no idea where my shirt is. I'm kinda worried.
Randomize