She's NOT homeless...she graduated early.
Some kid in my class just puked in his backpack, zipped up the backpack, put the backpack on and walked out the door.
No, i know about the eggs and penis, the oh wow was for the fire
dude there is absolutely no room for a slide in our room
dizzyuy bat. 3.453 lkos. hoit sx, now im single. blackouteed
Is it sad that i just saw my moms thumb on the table & i instinctively put mine down cuz i thought she was thumbmaster?
You were pouring Patron into the window of the squad car trying to get the police dog to drink it
So thats why that cop beat my ass?
Probably
Also, upon examining the photos, I have concluded that you were the sloppiest drunk girl of the night. And that's saying something considering Hurricane Jessica was in town.
He fucks like those drill things that you see when you think of texas
Just fat and dog and sweat all over the bed. All night long.
We met some guy at the beach, and dug a hole with him. He invited us to "come back at night and smoke a blunt in this hole"
He called me saying he got nice rims for his car so now we can fuck in style
I re-seduced my fuck buddy...must be the luck of the Irish!
I have like three friends I don't have sex with, what did you expect
Be quiet or buzz aldrin will come beat you up with science
Randomize
