don't you miss dr. quinn: medicine woman? i do.
Now that the olympics are over we have no excuse for getting belligerently drunk for nationalism every night.
watching "look who's talking now." getting choked up at the end when they find each other at the cabin
doesn't that movie star kirstie alley and have talking dogs in it? new low...even for you
its taking every last moral i have not to steal this bike
you still have morals?
Well actually itd just be too hard to ride the bike with this large rake i just stole
Why do I only have half my beard? My chin is so naked...
Wake up. We're going shopping for booze and samurai swords.
We hit a deer while we were singing an acapella version of "I will always love you"
Well, my eyeball is red and the rest of my eye is black. Oh the joys of drinking with u. PS- I laid in a pile of sawdust. it was ok at the time.
I'm super stoned watching the vatican smoke cam. Come over.
She's been drunk for three days now
Like three straight days. 72 hours
She's been covered in glitter for the last two and somehow she found a monkey
I'm going to write a horror movie. It's going to be called "Fat People on a Squeaky Bed" and it's going to feature me laying in bed last night listening to my overweight roommate and her fat boyfriend tossing and turning all night
Don't have sex in a tent there are so many opportunities for infections
I guess the wine stains on your shirt and the $2 vodka tonics you're sweating out just scream, "Welcome to DC, please ask me for directions."
I can't wait to get home and drunk cuddle your dog
If I don't get alcohol poisoning from tonight I don't think i ever will.
Randomize