i just rolled a joint on the giving tree. that book has given me so much.
all her text said was "asdfhdaufhudshfuds" and i knew that meant come over
Putting the hydrocodone in Pez dispensers. Do you want Speedy Gonzales or Darth Vader?
he will always be the guy i fucked in the hallway.
Don't byou dare ruin egg salad by putting your penis in it that would be so sad.
I heard you were walking home with taylor with your dress completely up and your ass exposed
Yeah, that sounds like my life.
I came out, you were peeing on the car and when I asked why you said it deserved it because its a rental
Im cutting you off tonight ONE boy at a time
I took her to the bar and boom. All of my past slump busters were there. Shes cool enough to know what that means and said she was afraid they'd eat her so we left.
I am. I woke up on someone's front lawn dressed as max Payne also be proud.
5 hours of volunteer work playing with puppies and banned from the frat I hate most as 'punishment'... Besides the ER trip, I'm not seeing the bad in this situation
He said "send me a motivational picture" so I sent one with mayo on my face that said "clearly I'm no stranger to white stuff on my face"...I'm the fuckingng worst
Thus began an intricate shell game of nude cardigan photos
U NO SLUT. YOUR HEART IS JUST FREE.
I wasn’t trying, but work got a lot easier and more fun once he starred flirting with me and looking at my ass
Randomize
