She's JV to your varsity
do all gilrs hav hair on thier vagaina ?
Don't drive home.
HER PREGGO ASS BROUGHT SPEGHETTI-O'S... IN HER PURSE.
I'm gonna make this happen. You think it would be too forward to text him my room number with turn by turn directions straight to my crotch?
Somewhere between catching the stove on fire and not being aware of it being on fire while I'm in the living room. I drank too much.
i'm drinking margaritas from a pouch...really dont think i'm in the position to judge anyone...
Hey, no judgement here...this is the girl that threw up on a box of kittens at the magician's house
you cant ever make fun of my bong's stick on moustache again. its the reason the cop let me keep it and my weed.
Malibu has added tequila to its rum. It's like when two beautiful gaybies come together an spawn a unicorn that only cries jellybean tears.
Dude, the coffee is horrible this morning, Cass changed something about it
We ran out of Bailey's Irish cream...
This is what regular coffee tastes like?!?! Fuck the adult life.
OMG BTW REMEMBER HOW HE ORDERED PIZZA THAT ONE TIME WE HOOKED UP. APPARENTLY HE WAS HANDING IT OUT TO PEOPLE WHO LIVE IN MY BUILDING AS HE WAS LEAVING
It was super embarrassing when I had to tell my brother, in front of my mother, that my wifi password was Drinkupbitches. Thanks for providing that lovely family moment.
He said it wasn't ladylike of me to drink more whiskey than him. I told him to stop being a little bitch.
My mom said she saw you at the grocery store. Said you looked like you were "headed for a Lindsay Lohan quarter life crisis of sorts"
So our bartender was in the bathroom the same time I was so I ordered a beer mid stream.....is that weird?
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