Down for casual relationships, more fun than catholic missionary, bring condoms and don't get attached.
it was beautiful and magic like when a hot girl grabs her own tits and smiles at you
Why do you apologize after every time we have sex?
What's your middle initial? I need it for the census. I put us down as "unmarried partners."
Oh my god... you're gay. Ps, its A.
No no. According to the 2010 US Census, we're gay.
Its so hard looking at my mom and pretending I'm not dying a slow death of binge drinking
thanks for carrying me to bed.. and sorry for trying to roll down the hallway to escape.
Is that you who's passed out on my treadmill?
Do you think I can wear the dress I went to jail in with the shoes I went to prom in to the wedding tonight?
figured after she passed out and i threw up in her bed, morning sex would be pushing it.
I am not working on the very first day I can throw up alcohol that I legally bought and drank.
I just put bronzer on my abs to snapchat nudes. If that's not going hard I don't know what is
But truly, sorry about your empty vagina
Thanks boo.
So I totally had sex In a teepee last night at that wedding reception.
There is an episode of "how it's made" on tv right now. The subject is tequila and water beds. Basically my life.
Protip if he licks the back of your knee and you reflexively kick him your game of 'lick the lady' is over.
Randomize
