that drag queen yelled at him and touched me to make him jealous and said things like this is what a real man feels like. it was a thrill.
I give out O-faces like they're halloween candy
he said "you're pretty" then i made out with him. thats all it took
My grandma had to be escorted out by police.
I refuse to fuck a guy who needs a coozy for his beer. NOT EVEN IN DESPERATE TIMES LIKE THESE.
I AM THERE IN SPIRIT, TICKLING YOUR BALLS
He put his hand in my cleavage. NOT ON. IN. BETWEEN. NO more gingers
Mom just referred to a 9 year old as "this bitch", so I'd say day drinking was a success.
you know it's a good party when the fucking floor caves in. THE FUCKING FLOOR.
by the way whatever wisdom you imparted upon me last night was lost to whatever i smoked out of a beer can.
Did you seriously just hashtag my sex life as #yolo2013?
You've fucked so many I should get a word bank when you make me guess these things.
And the cops are back. At least my pants are on this time
Dad danced with a girl half his age and her boyfriend just sat at the bar and waited for dad to be done. I bought pity nachos.
It was marvelous. I was drunkenly conversing with my professor in some of the best Spanish I've ever spoken.
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