ur plase or mine? lol
well if you don't learn how to spell, you may be at your place and I'll be at mine.
There is no way to make a throwing up smiley so just picture it....
I walked in on my roommate finishing watching something on his computer. There was cum all over his screen. He awkwardly said hi and pulled up his pants.
nothing cures the holiday blues like an open bar
He was drunk at Denny's at 5 am saying how Dear John was the worst movie he has ever seen... eyes filled with tears.
just once i'd like the "right thing" and the "topless thing" to be the SAME THING
ok, my life is complete.... the cops AND the paramedic just made a Mean Girls reference...
The usual. Woke up on a dog bed with peeps and $11.
Did you sleep with Connor? And who undressed me? There's a picture of two guys peeing out my bedroom window. What happened?
So to recap Superbowl Sunday - I won $100, bumped into the anti-christ and his cult, met a guy in a kilt and a wican, then got invited to a gayguy afterhours party.
Gonna be tough to beat that next year!
I got sucker punched while I was making out with some girl...I think my molar might have flown into her mouth
He got naked after doing the Ice Water Challenge and it was still enormous. So, yeah, I stayed over.
He said he didn't want to go down on me so I told him we were going to have an oral stalemate.
I baked a frozen pizza completely, put it back in the plastic and box, and put it back in the freezer. THAT drunk.
She came out of the bathroom listening to her iPod and crying. Then she started scream 'she will be loved'. She seems to be handling the break up well lol
Randomize
