Can you send me a pic of you vag, I'm sexting the guy and he wants a pic but I didnt shave
dude are you serious?
I know you already have a pic on your phone
yeah my walk of shame consisted of driving on the wrong side of the road at 6am still drunk with cum drying in my hair and left eye.
remind me next year to leave the 19 year old girl at home when you're going to pride. total cock block
i had a dream last night that my liver tore its self out of my body and ran away.
we were having sex and she freaked out when i said nipple
It's either jizz or frosting, and either way, someone's being held accountable.
a guy tried paying for lapdances with cds, who uses those anymore?
we started pounding beers an hour ago to celebrate our personal snow day tomorrow. vodka shots for u of i's actual decision are on standby.
I miss your penis. I'm telling you this as a friend, like its just a really great penis. You should be proud of it.
He picked up a chick with a line about the price of used cars in Sri Lanka and developing economies. Step it up.
Wors thing about having a cop dad: random drug testing
I just got a lap dance from a kid in the coconut bra... So not drunk enough for this.
I just had sex on a roof
So, in keeping with the last two years, are we going to watch the new Hobbit movie on acid again? It's kinda starting to feel like a Christmas tradition.
he played intl players anthem 4me and ate a strawberry out of my pussy
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