So yesterday I was on craigslist and I saw a listing for a sofa-cum-bed. I knew what they meant...
My Yahoo Answers account was suspended. Apparently I answered "I like chicks who do anal" to over 100 questions last night.
Just dunked an oreo in a white russian. Trying to think of a better experience in my life and failing.
Just wondering why in an apartment full of stoners there is half a waffle in the TRASH CAN. get ur shit together man
I hope this doesn't become one of those friendships where we dont have sex
I don't know what he did but now I'm terrified of mustache rides and it's only movember 3rd
I think he just made me trade sex for my cat.
This is why i like single justin better. my only regret is not being present for more of his short life. may he rest in peace
somehow this turned into a costume party you have to get here now with my banana suit or I'm wearing my birthday suit
You know where a good place to spend summer is? In your head. High as shit. It doesn't matter where you are.
i came home to her naked eating chilli on the living room floor. Stop giving her jager.
This Alex the guy who suck your belly ring
I'm just a little concerned for your well being... and your penis too I suppose.
Have you ever had chicken nuggets while high? Because it tastes like hearing the Beatles for the first time
My friend asked me if I got home okay and I replied "Glad teat. Goodnight." Usually I can translate drunk me, but I'm even lost on that one.
Randomize
