singing on the bus should be illegal
huh?
There's a group of like 8 white people in the back of the bus harmonizing to sugar we're going down
i just ate something from under my fingernail. i dont know what it was, but it tasted half decent
I just told this girl who bought a pregnancy test "good luck"
I started drinking at 10.30am. Ive got a solid buzz, ive decided holidays are to be treated like gamedays
you started crying because you didn't get to wear your rainboots this week so i turned on the shower and let you jump around in it
youre the best friend ever
Yes, that's a picture of my balls. It isn't however an answer to my question.
So many lesbians keep hitting on me. I'm about to give up and just go home with the manliest one.
Lying on this bed is like lying on love and marshmallows and joy
If I got everything I wanted in the world, I would have been forcing soup down your throat hours ago
i refuse to give everyone the satisfaction of seeing the results of my acting on my thoughts
Everyone was in the walk-in getting high, and I had to be all cool. Serving soup and salads. Night manager status doesn't pay enough.
Remember that girl from my stats. class that I ran into at the bar 2 weeks ago? She literally hasn't been to class once since I told her I sit behind her.
I'm going to stop at grocery on the way home. I'm CRAVING wine from a sippy cup. We have neither wine nor sippy cups.
Leave it to me and my dad to puke on the same guy at the same bar 25 years apart
Remember those neighbors I thought were FBI agents? Turns out they're DEA.
Randomize