I just met lou reed's venus in furs. Her hands are slippery.
its like whenever the snow comes all the hott girls drop out of school. where are they
She said "I only hook up with guys I'm dating"
So... What happend then?
We dated for an hour, i broke up with her after. BOOM.
It will be a surprise...all i can say is stripper clown
things I have learned from cosmo today- 40% of guys are uncircumsized, you can have a beer facial, and i really need to get tested for std's
the realtor just asked me if i've ever made meth on this property.... i need to do something about my hair
It's not really that big. Girls just think it feels big. It's a cocktical illusion.
The only image of you you know is from reflections or pictures. Its 2d. But what other people see is 3d. How do you know that's your real face! MIND.BLOWN.
We found her on the balcony debating if it was easier to jump or throw up. Neither decision would not have been good for the 91 year old below us.
The only people in the library at 5:00 on the friday after finals are homeless or pre-med.
And in that, my finest lazy stoner moment, I used my cleavage to hold my bowl steady while I packed it laying down in bed.
I accused the cab driver of smoking weed in the taxi then I remember it was me.
I'm perplexed as to why anyone on this planet is straight
Sooooooo, can scratch getting a pelvic exam by a man dressed as Woody from Toy Story off my list.
You need to write an essay about this experience.
He was even wearing the hat.
Thanks for not letting me choke to death on my vomit last night
Thank you for attempting to organize my DVDs in chronological and alphbetical order
Randomize
