We're pretty sure the 'pocket' aspect of the hot pocket is unnecessary. Testing our theory now.
you alive?
ya, the episode of maury where people are afraid of things are on, i had to keep livin
there's no toilet paper. I'm using wheat bread.
He fucked volume into my hair. It was amazing.
He shaved off his eyebrows. This is not my life.
Be still, my beating vagina.
Just lifeguarded a kid's party hungover so I could afford to go out drinking tonight. Circle of life shit goin on here.
I hate when people see you passed out in your front yard and call 911. Like what, you can't take a nap face down on your steps at 4pm?
Can you explain the plethora of sunflower seeds in the dryer?
I just smoked weed out of a baked potato.
You rock my world.
Conversations we need to have while high 1) how mermaids reproduce 2) if blind people hallucinate what do they see 3) reincarnation
i feel like i am made of mashed potatoes. i love cannabis pills so. fucking. much.
You are the best. Or certainly adequate for tempering my unholy desires.
That's the nicest thing you've ever said to me.
You really need to not quote Anchorman while I'm giving you a serious blowjob.
My uncle showed up to pick us up at the bar just as I bought a drink so I put it in my pocket #drunksmart
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