Totally saw a hot amputee. I think this is called character growth.
Promise me that if I become one of those sad people that facebook pesters you to 'reconnect with' you'll tell me so I can delete mine and save myself the humiliation?
its like whenever the snow comes all the hott girls drop out of school. where are they
how do you say "fuck me and leave bruises" in italian?
the only muscles i have these days is kegels
Like some sort of pot growing robin hood.
Just a heads up before you get home. Took the shelves out of the fridge so i could fit the beer ball and bucket of riot punch. Apparently i decided the stove was the best place to keep them. They got cooked when we pre heated to cook a bird we shot. This may be the final straw for our security deposit
he told me he was a Boston Bruins fan so I took his hat into the bathroom and peed in it...I've never been a prouder Ranger fan
If you put those two in a room together it'd be like a Taylor Swift fantasy and an Adele nightmare just licking faces
Dude of course I want to. Your penis is beautiful.
We can't go back there. Ever. No context required, just know it's true.
i took a magical journey through the park for about two hours. it was amazing and everything was fantastical. i have been informed someone babysat me through that shit.
Not my fault the fence refused to just break when I ran into it.
Ahha guy saw me buying beer, went "hmmmmm" and nodded his head approvingly. No words exchanged, but he has made his way to my heart haha
We still getting married? Or were you day drinking
Randomize
