One girl and one boy is just not enough.
Could guys at least pretend I require some amount of money to be spent before I randomly go down on them?
It's official. Every guy I've slept with has been to jail.
So I'll spare the details, but I think I discovered I'm lactose intolerant. In my sleep. And you'll be needing new sheets.
She threw up everywhere and is crying about a fictional character who died on Grey's Anatomy
i dont know what it was but it was definately NOT a vagina
Houston, we have a blender
I can feel myself smiling like 10 minutes after I stop smiling, and that's just like... so awesome.
It's one of those days where you order the free Papa John's pizza so the delivery guy can bring you Coke to go with your rum. The tip was more than the order.
This is amazing. I can pinpoint the window in time that you lost all sanity.
all i remember is walking in on u shitting and crying listening to shawty get loose. its safe to say this break up has taken a toll on u
Did you leave ur panties in the sink?
Kitchen or bathroom?
I love the smell of your bedroom. It smells of a mixture of cherries, leather, and unrequited homosexual desire.
For future reference: When the bouncer is approaching you to remove you from his bar, you don't respond by taking off your pants.
shit... I double booked my fuck buddies
Randomize
