normally i'm against accepting campers on facebook but this one saw me giving head to another counselor and didn't say shit about it to my boss so i feel like shes earned the right to look at my sloppy drunk pictures
I can only imagine the horrible things my future wife is doing on spring break right now.
She talked about nothing but beanie babies for 45 minutes. I'm never getting high with her again.
And I'm ok with his balls touching my ass
Thinking about adopting a 16 yr old here. Her name is Abby and she likes vodka. We've bonded. I need a sober driver n e ways...
Exactly. Because my vagina can't be consoled with words. It requires a thicker form of communication
You know, I've never slept in a rug with anyone before you
Fate is real! that hot chick, Megan just showed up dressed as jasmine and I'm dressed as Aladdin this is going to be cake
I'm just crazy horny about you
i saw way too much penis for that to have been a funeral
I knew my bag made it because I could smell the fireball that spilled inside of my suitcase before it was on the luggage carousel.
I made the last cup in beer pong off the dude's hat. I also faintly remember rapping Forever by Drake during said game.
we had sex in his office so i figured it was appropriate to like his company's page on facebook
She stood up through my sunroof the entire drive home. screaming her ass off and singing free falling..
If work found out I was using THEIR paper to write Karate Kid fanfic I'd never hear the end of it.
Randomize
