She was wearing a "Got Beer" hat and your bed had necco wafers all over it the next morning. Another story for the grandkids.
when she asked me if it was possible to swim under north america i knew it was time to leave.
what part of "i slept with our hot teacher" are you not excited about?!
the part where you beat me to him
fair enough.
i am positive it's ok to drink. it's just pieces of the plastic knife i forgot was in the blender.
honestly I asked the same thing when we had our slip n slide and margarita party
Started with us just having a beer. Now Ivan lit a torch to walk to the store, Ben smashed a 26 in the parking lot, and they're throwing broken shot glasses. Fratio Friday is something.
Best surprise in my car. A cookie, sliced kiwi and the rest of my margarita. Work is going to be awesome.
Guess who used an inflatable mattress to boat across a retention pond with brooms for oars and a radio and beer.
You said you wanted to wrap his dick in a tortilla and make a spicy burrito. Let me just say, most girls don't have this hard of a time getting laid.
I drank it. I drank the beer from '78. I drank my bday beer, I drank my soul
Yo this huge scar on my head from the car accident is truly a vag magnet. Probably because I'm telling people I was attacked by a mountain lion and killed it with my bare hands. But hey when life gives you lemons, you use them to get pussy
Just watched my first Christmas porn of the year. Def have the spirit now
I'm supposed to be at work in 10 min, I just woke up and am 45 min away...tinder for the win
I'm officially removing you from my nudes recipient list on snapchat.
You sat outside petting a picture of your cat for hours... not even the real thing... just a picture.
Randomize
