YOURE GIVING A BLOW JOB TO THE BOY WHO SAYS "OH SNAP"
she was most def 27.5% uglier than a troll, but the sex was great
you never realize your highschool teachers are real people till you fuck one of them
His ankle bracelet only gets in the way when I'm trying to take off his pants.
Im going to buy a thermometer. If its above 104 im going to the hospital if its under 104 im going to the bar
Her thighs are so strong. I thought my head was gonna get crushed when I was eating her out
Semen is not good for contacts.
It's ok. Rob's just shotgunning upside down.
Doctor just prescribed me 20mg Ritalin 3 times a day. It's becoming the "grain and oats" section of my food triangle.
To be clear, the next time I wake up with your dick inside me, I will reach down and grab one and squeeze until it pops like a grape. You've been warned.
Woke her up in the middle of the night with the smell from a fart. So proud of my colon.
first thing my tuition money buys is a strap on
Is posting a pic on insta of my previously dyed blue pubes socially acceptable?
He started out in my roommates bed and by the end of the night was in mine, not sure how that went down. But he left happy in the morning.
Today is a good day to get high. It's easy to blame the glazed-over look in my eye on my new contacts
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