If you borrow your friends real doll, should you wear a condom?
I have to start avoiding pregnant women. This is getting out of hand.
New record: 45 minutes. Afterwards I played We Are The Champions while we cuddled.
He smothers me through text. I can't even image what he'd be like in person.
Do fat girls normaly have fat that look like a penis by their pussy?
What the hell did you do last night?!
you cant just puke in an arbys and not order food. thatd be rude.
Under someone's bed. Not sure whose. I think they're sleeping in it.
this is not the first time I've had hot dogs and 151 for thanksgiving.
Like do you hear me I PUKED IN MY OWN HANDS AND HE STILL SAID I WAS GORGEOUS
The point remains that this is the setup for some great stories
Or terrible, horrifying, traumatic experiences
great clearly means different things to us
I'm wearing a utility belt filled with alcohol
He told me to prepare for his "Jurassic cock" and I had to leave the room from laughing.
I'm currently sitting beside my brother who is taking a bath and feeding him nachos while he covers his genitals. If that's not sibling bonding then I don't know what is
I can’t believe I made out with a flat earther and didn’t know about it until now!
maybe you met your husband and you just don't know it yet
and other hilarious jokes you can tell yourself
Randomize
