I just bought a large Pizza and Xanex in the same store...my night is complete
Five Mah tais Laser and i skill have not drunk dial you
what part of "i slept with our hot teacher" are you not excited about?!
the part where you beat me to him
fair enough.
I knew he was a nice guy, because when we switched positions he flipped the mattress so I wouldn't have to lay in a pool of his sweat.
Everything smells like beer. Everything. But I cant drag myself out of bed to take a shower. So beer it is.
My time here is complete. I think I have now thrown up in every major degree programs building
the reason i can drink whatever i want and you have a limit is because whiskey will never make my pussy not work
I think you just have to raise your bang age from 40 to 50, hope dust doesn't fly out and make her say tony danza
You were petting your bowl of cocoa puffs and shushing it softly while staring at the mirror
So you'd go straight for a fat chick with cheese on her tits?
Yes.
I'm never going out with the ashleys again. it was whoreible. terrifyingly whoreible.
I just did the math technically I'll be drunk until 2:30-3:00pm
You're telling that to the kid drinking Jack in nothing but a graduation cap
Nice. I got home at like 3am.stopped at Walmart for a vacuum and weirdly a trash can. Not sure why high me last night needed a new trashcan.
Um I got a ride home from the bar with two random boys and one tried to bang me on my parents riding mower
Randomize
