If you had to guess, would you say that as a species, midgets are more or less flammable than humans?
Less. Duh. They have less combustible mass.
Wasted at the beach. Toasting underage, overdeveloped girls. God bless 'em.
i've never been more proud of someone than i was when he told me he got his first blowjob at age 13...from two chicks
So.. My internet got red-flagged at work because i did a search on "midigit strippers las vegas" This may be hard to explain...
Found half of a five day old piece of pizza behind my dresser. Apparently it was drunkenly set there and got knocked down. It was such a happy reminder of last weekend.
I found a cheeseburger next to my tub once. It's there to shame you, but it always just makes me feel more awesome.
DONT EVER DUNK OREOS INTO WINE . NEVER
I'm glad I get the same reaction from you for cookies and for my naked body
When your boyfriends ex-girlfriend texts you to see what you're wearing to his sister's wedding that you were not invited to, nor knew about. I think it's time to call it quits.
Doing the walk of shame at 1 AM. Stumbled across a rave. This night is epic.
I had sex with him for the first time drunk, dressed in a toddler overall tutu costume, at 2pm. Horrible start.
I'm just concerned as to why his penis is two different colors.
Stay away a while longer.
Still not sure if they're cops or strippers.
I had sex upstairs in my parents house, and my mom texted me and said "those raccoons are out of control in the walls."
he literally walked in took a shit and left ringing the 'great service' bell on the way out.
I collect Covid conspiracy theories like I collect Pokemon.
Randomize
