at a bonfire and someone threw a plastic cup in the fire. everyone immediately stopped what they were doing to yell collectively at him about what he was doing to the environment, then went back to drinking
only in oregon
And you kept hanging up and calling back because you thought I wasn't greeting you properly.
the sex was "jacking off to playboy" bad.
he kept asking me "do you love it? tell me you love it" as I was riding him.
and...?
I told him it was alright.
Oh I forgot to tell you one of the little boys in my preschool class was wearing a Hooters tank top today.
the paramedics asked what clubs id be in next weekend so they can plan ahead.
So, we bought a knight today. Nearly life size. Hes in the garage, so don't be startled.
I don't understand how these people can do extreme gymnastics and I have problems walking up the stairs.
Teenager with grandparents staying in their room: is to blue balls, as parent waiting for teen to come home safe: is to sleep. You will live- love mom
I was looking at our sex bingo and pretty much every single row or column has at least one kind of person that is harder to find than all the rest
We've made things harder for ourselves
The struggle will be part of the fun
Besides the one of you shaking your cock for 10sec that was one of the best snapchat's ever haha
Whip out the absinthe and the taquitos, this motherfucker just passed the bar.
and that's when you shouted "ahh motherland" as you streaked down hall 4B
I just found a samari sword in the couch. I'm about to take like 5 shots and pretend to be captain jack sparrow
This will never work. His dick is smaller than mine.
Wow. And yours is kind of small.
RIGHT?
Randomize
