Pussy?
how
Wat do u mean how?
You know if a vagina was a face, it'd be ugly as hell...
I know the vomits not mine cause its on my back.
They were like stripper heels, except business stripper heels, the kind strippers would wear to court.
you woke me up at 7 am banging on my wall.. what the hell
thats the international knock for joint time
He looked at my vag and said "you have a nice situation down there. Good work"
Mr. Clingalot just ran from our apartment. What the hell?
I started to cry afterward and mumble random things. Examples: "God, please don't make me be so gay anymore" and "my mom is going to be so proud of me for fucking a dude this time." It was that or let him stay the night and cuddle. I mean, fuck that horrible shit I'm a girl that needs her space.
Not a clue. But I did find out that his penis has a British accent.
We bonded over the fact that we each, separately, got arrested on the same weekend.
i refuse to give everyone the satisfaction of seeing the results of my acting on my thoughts
Let's just says his mouth writes a lot of checks that his penis just can't cash. Don't waste your time.
I had sex in the back of a hot foreign guy with a lacoste eye patch's car
we were having a conversation about big dicks and the chick at the table beside us turned to us said "me and my boyfriend just broke up a few days ago. Could you please NOT talk about big dicks"
FUCK. EVERYONE MAKE MY CONTACT NAME DADDY ISSUES
I'm just going to take a nap and hope I wake up more attractive.
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