before i die, we are going to oregon and playing oregon trails for real. like putting things in a hat & people will pull out whether they live or die. and they die of fun things like typhoid, dysentary, or hunting accident.
they're using the ping pong table for ping pong. it's weird
I want Paula Dean to narrate shark week next year
So... he formspringed me a link to every nude pic ive taken since he 8th grade. ive evolved nicely. but im nervous as to how this a website.
I changed the background on my phone to a picture of you so whenever I go to look at porn or text another girl I'll have second thoughts
Am I supposed to find that romantic?
You have proved your worthiness to join me on the quest of taking shots at every academic building on campus by showing up drunk to our test at 12:30 today
Druken naked yoga : jus another ploy to keep your husbands eye in check
I probably should have waited until after the game to pity fuck him. You know, seeing as we lost.
That's why you bone lesbian cage fighters and 45 year olds. To make life less boring.
She said if her future children dont have blue eyes she wont love them
My penis needs a shock collar
Yeah, I'm sure we have time for sex AND ihop.
Just imagine a dick squawking like a parrot
I woke up to a huge bag of McDonalds breakfast, a cup of coffe and Advil. The note read "yeah its a one night thing, but I felt bad so here you go. Thanks"
He just set a new unobtainable standard in one night stand etiquette.
I just put my eye make up on in the bathroom of the bar.... I may be too comfortable here....
Randomize