Reindeer Drinking Games will soon commence. Get over here while we're still sober enough to answer the door.
It's really too bad Cosmo doesn't have "What To Do When You've Drunkenly Sucked His Dick and He Doesn't Text You Back" article.
that would be two times in a week with two different guys.
they have the same name so it only counts as one guy right?
Remember that foreign guy who never talked last night? He just came out of my bathroom when I woke up.
That's so unfortunate for him bc you can always find another penis, but he's stuck with it
I cagt a turtle and named him squirt. He's in my bathtub Caleb is feeding me peaches! This is the most beautiful vodka Thursday ever!
the fact that we had sex in the dining hall makes it seem so much more like home.
Sitting in back of morning lecture drinking a daqueri from my pink unicorn cup. Pretty sure the girl next to me smells it.
Want a slice of this weekend's hottest piece of ass?
I left my bra and a book at his place. He's a hot Scandinavian who is into physics and computers - had to step up my game.
Cleaning my pipe and using the left over resin solution to make THC laced rolling papers and a jar of hash oil/honey for my tea
WE USE THE WHOLE BUFFALO
Best compliment ever: Being told that you really understand sex by a professional. After she gave you a HANDJOB.
I apparently used the line "I'm a bouncer too so i would know if I were too drunk" then they asked me to leave.
It's election day and I was just tied up with an American flag scarf
Mom saw my dick pic over my gf's shoulder. She told her she really should've had me circumcised.
Randomize
