He had on juicy sweatpants and thats when i knew he was no longer a threat.
im goin to the NYE party with a tuxedo painted on my body. i know a girl who does it. wanna join?
How many times a week can a couple have a threesome with the same guy before it becomes some sort of 3-way relationship?
I've blown him while he hit my bong, I've blown him while he played video games and now I'm looking for a new challenge. Don't even try suggesting a blumpkin.
Just sent my cousin to buy me a new bra cause mine is zip tied to a bar in the middle of nowhere Iowa
Thats alot of pressure.
Just on your vagina. BTW I'm passing your house.
hahahaha what do we need the kangaroos for? please tell me we release them instead of doves
Why do I think he'd like to keep my hair in a box?
and everyone will high five me and girls will approach me offering blowjobs
This morning confirmed it...there's no maybe about it. She definitely wasn't born with it. It was definitely the Maybelline.
I am pretty great at coffee and mistakes
What's a nice way of saying 'I wish I hadn't fucked you.'
I’m a go ahead and fuck down ATL. So when I leave in January I’ll have no regrets.
Who the abstract fuck do you think you are!?
We were totally high while having sex, I told him fast or slow, just follow your balls. That was a show stopper.
Randomize
