new low, shannon just screamed FUCK THE IRISH to a 10 year old's face then proceeded to throw a hotdog at his parents. I think its time i take her home.
I just wasted my iTunes Gift Card on a season pass for Hannah Montana. Bad decision?
Peed in a church parking lot last night. As if Jesus didnt hate me enough already.
you just kept yelling "siddle that plaza" til the cab driver said it back...
bong water from a few floors above me just splashed onto my face when i was looking out the window. Happy 4/21 to me
Walking down the street at 11 pm dressed in bubble wrap. Why is the bar so fucking far away??
he texted me at 3am asking for "one of my famous blowjobs"
We had three bowls going. It was a tri-bowl tournament. Harry potter shit.
I deserve a fucking award for best roommate. I just cleaned his room, so he can have a 3 some
You need to be more adventurous.
I am! Just not in a "I wanna get diseases" way
I need a drink and a shade of lipstick that will put the fear of God in a man's heart.
He had an extremely smooth butt for a man with such rough hands.
I can't decide if this outfit makes me look like a pirate. I also can't decide if I care if it does.
For both our sake, we've decided to ban watching combat sports before sex
Sorry I peed on your ottoman
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