Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
those bitches were sniggering at my man-pris like they were goddesses of fashion!
...dude i pray you are quoting something, someone, anyone...
I just got a ticket for shitting on a sand dune.
You know you have a problem when the only thing that saves you is that you drank so late into the night that you sleep through the designated walk of shame time window
my coke dealer is running a Black Friday special
i got really high and listened to the spongebob squarepants theme song and, i swear to god, it was in german.
No, this time she was diabetic. I think I fucked her into diabetic shock.
you invented a new sport called "bacon pulling" and you cried everytime a piece broke
I AM NOT THE MAN IN THIS RELATIONSHIP.
It's shit like this that makes people think we're gay.
I'm sitting outside your room listening for sex noises eating pepperoni...slowly
Just specific performance'd my way into her pants. I literally said specific performance and that shit worked. Thanks B. Law!
I think I fell in love with her when I saw her kick a freshman in the chest
I swear to go if the response she sends me something along the lines of who the fuck is Mark Hamill I might need to brake up with her.
WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU
MANY MANY THINGS AND MOST OF THEM ARE YOUR FUCKING FAULT
I came so hard I literally levitated off the top of his dick. Gravity was no match for that orgasm!
Randomize
