So it's 10:55am and I just woke up on the floor in the hallway on the4th floor. There should probably be no moredrinking competetions.
So you know how craigslist used to have an "erotica" section? And how after you click on a link it changes a darker color? And how Dad stays up really late most nights?
Oh god... well at least he's gettin some. Mom's a prude.
it feels like theres a golf ball between my legs. the sex was totally worth it tho.
i'm pretty sure i just ruined some dude's romantic riverside sunset proposal by running outside and puking in a bush.
he thinks im joking when i say don't visit. i mean it's summer...he was the college fuck and now it's time for the summer fuck
it was really bad. he went around saying "I want you inside of me" to everyone.
I just taped a plastic bag to my ceiling for the next time I have to throw up on the top bunk. Why am I so good at college?
my night ended in me puking all over jenna's bed, then me trying to wash the sheets in the toilet.
yeah but think of how much more hungover we'd be if we didn't steal those cookies
I'm going to need a Jurassic park sized pooper scooper to deal with all this shit last night caused.
Found a phone out last night at the bar. EPIC homemade porn vids on it!
My liver needs the occasional pep talk and a reminder that we are two weeks into freshman year of college.
I couldn't think of the word "bath" so instead I told him I was marinating in soapy water
I kinda forgave him after he laid next to me and rubbed my arm for four hours while I tripped balls.
So I crawled off the trampoline to puke in the neighbors yard. Wonderful house guest right here
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