i just spent an hour trying to convince my blind date that star wars is better than star trek. help me
So, when he came he screamed MORTAL KOMBAT!!!! at the top of his lungs and all of his roomates yelled back FINISH HER!!!!.....yeah kinda akward
im sleeping in a hamic at a mansion. best hangover ever
I wore my underwear in the shower just in case i passed out and you had to come in and get me
someone left their shoes, a resume, and a pizza in the shower... i am actually speechless
new girl just came onto the hall stumbling drunk with no shoes on and the guy who brought her doesn't have them either
I just watched dragonflies fucking. You can't match that level of geek.
I hope my orgasm sounds aren't secretly that bad and no one tells me
How does this dude know what a dying walrus sounds like? That's the real question
I swear that when we jog in the morning I can hear it slap between his thighs
He seemed genuinely disappointed when I told him I wasn't going to make out with him to Bring Me To Life by Evanescence so I feel like I've pinpointed the breaking point of this relationship
Is it day drinking when the suns up like when does that start
asking for a friend
Just bedazzled a flask, while drinking out of it. Hot glue is EVERYWHERE.
I forget, are we banging TA’s for grades this semester or not?
Depends on how cute he is
He’s disease free and drives a Porsche. What else does a girl need?
Are we allowed to ho on the roof?
Randomize
