I feel like a really awesome person when i have to check my roof for things i've lost
Well, she opened the door to puke outside the car, but she threw it open so hard it popped back and hit her in the face.
just saw a former disney star do a keg stand. her life choices have improved.
Count me out. I seem to have semen induced blindness in one eye.
Best elective surgery ever. Having a great time ignoring girls' pleas to pull out and blowing it inside anyway. I like to watch them absolutely freak out and go batshit crazy for 20 mins before I mention the snip-snip surgery. Power trip.
you can't tell me it's over and send me pics of you and your cat?
We ended not having sex. I didn't want to explain that I was wearing a Unitard because all my socks and underwear were dirty.
I think we should go through the tsa checkpoint with raging hardons when we go through LAX. I think we should pass out some viagra to everyone
My mouth taste like pussy and my dad noticed. Hahahaha
I'm drawing the line at your vagina. I will not accompany you to get that pierced and/or tattooed. There's got to be some mystery to our relationship.
Just pee around me
Two days later and my throat is still sore. That bong is a double edged sword.
Our sibling relationship has really blossomed into a wonderful mutual acceptance of sluttyness
I even put my vibrators back in the bedroom instead of the coffee table. If that's not growing up then I don't know what is.
I just didn't expect to have anal in a retail store at 9 AM on a Tuesday.
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