oh great. the only prospects for sex left for the night are douchebag in the ed hardy shirt & frodo-looking ass
fuck it... i'll be the lord of his rings
he just watched a baby story on tlc while high and just called me screaming he never wants me to get pregnant
then he said we can't have sex anymore because ill hate him.
he suggested i make a website called "cum on molly's face", to "start off my acting career"
I don't know if the fire truck was perfect timing or if she actually burned something down.
So I was gonna stay in tonight but the president got me motivated! I will not quit. Bars here I come.
Last night I dreamed I was having gay sex in prison. That's the last time we go to theme night at the club.
I'm so horny
I have no idea who this is, but I'm up for a lecture on self-respect
this is worse than the time i threw up a condom.
You took my underwater blowjob virginity.
Also I just had a flash back ... He told me I have nice nipples and then asked me about yours..
You threw up in your own shoe then wore it home
Bring me your tired, your weary, your buffalo chicken dip
The worst thing about having to live at your parents again is the struggle to make up more excuses to cover up the booty calls.
Also, my guy said they would be around. And i clarified that when I asked him for mushrooms he didn't hear "a mushroom or two" but rather understood I meant "all the mushrooms you can find between now and 4th of July."
gave up morals for lent, so far it's actually been really easy.
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