There is a new fb quiz: "are you at ypical woman, future ex or from crazy town" - should i take it?
Aren't all three of those the same though?
You kept shouting "Relax and take notes" every time before you would hit the blunt
Some dude just bet me $8 I couldn't smoke a pack of cigarettes in an hour...It sounds stupid, but I really wanna do it. If I survive, I'll have $8 and it'll look good on my resume.
you kept shouting how the only tree you would hump is an elm tree because they're under populated
What's your middle initial? I need it for the census. I put us down as "unmarried partners."
Oh my god... you're gay. Ps, its A.
No no. According to the 2010 US Census, we're gay.
I think my vagina was keeping me fat all these years out of self preservation. It's like she knew what would happen if I lost the weight.
Remember that time i gave you head on MY birthday and you made me stop so you could watch the rhino part in 300
I'm glad that even though we are states apart our whorish hearts beat as one
Nearly got hit by a blue bell ice cream truck. Can I count on you to make plenty of puns like "her life was sweet, and so was her death" at my funeral if that was to happen?
Take the weirdness of Japan and add the insanity of Florida and that's Jimmy
She broke up with me. I guess I was in the most chaste lesbian relationship in the history of the world and had no idea.
Dude so help me god I WILL weigh a penis one day
I really don’t want to have kids.
I thought we agreed we were done with dirty talk for the day
Beer Olympics must happen in honor of the legit Olympics.
thats all i want out of life, to get high and watch weiner dog races
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