New drinking game: drink every time the guy whose room we are in is creepy
enjoy the hospital
I think east. Tornado watch. What the fuck are you doing in Texarkana?
Bonnaroo. Tornado watch? Expand on that thought.
Watch for tornadoes.
im just gonna turn drinking alone on new years into a tradition
I havnt been this mad since the coche de Los murtos incident
No now hes going to beat me to our goal of getting someone to have sex in the library. I hate periods.
I don't know what to judge you more for.
it appears as though my vagina has gotten the best of me again
Just made out with the bride... She was still in her dress & I was still in my bridesmaid dress, how's that for an album picture?!?
Knitting and drinking wine. Forget my 21st birthday, might as well just skip to my 60th
Just found out I reached my $2500 deductible and I have a $5 million dollar cap on my health insurance. Let's get drunk and do something recklessly stupid tonight.
On the verge of sleeping with a man who can take me to an early bird dinner and a movie with his AARP discount. YOLO
You yelled to anyone that tried to help you "I have a burrito, what else could a girl want?"
I just smoked by myself in my childhood bedroom, how happy does it seem I am to be home for Christmas?
I have no idea what happened last night, but my pee is neon green.
I drunkenly texted ur dad last night telling him he raised great kids hahahahaha
Really should've known 2020 was gonna suck when the guy dressed as baby new year got arrested at our party 5 past midnight...
Randomize
