we went to that german restaurant and drank out of the boots. Then I threw up into one
Some girl next to me in class is making a list of whta to pack for spring break & it was a normal list until she put birth control in all caps w/ stars around it
You were shirtless with a cowboy hat in 15 degree weather then u shotgunned a can of mixed vegetable Progresso soup
Yeaaah. I'm kinda wary about that guy. Does he still have that taser that he found on the train?
Our Icelandic basketball player brought cocaine and rachael is screaming that he should do lines off her stomach. It's that kind of party
This girl just swallowed a pealed banana whole. I'm not worthy.
Is the mullet a good, great, or horrible idea before we leave for college
He was dressed as the 420 Easter bunny...he looked like a walking anti-drug campaign.
HOW THE FUCK CAN YOU NOT REMEMBER WHIPPING IT OUT AND PUTTING ON THE BAR?
By the way, you're banned for life.
My wife managed to convince me to not drink everclear by threatening to ban me from her vagina
Only time and a comprehensive case study of all of your relationships will tell.
Well... This is my last night at the resort. So far, the only thing that has been in my vagina is sand.
He literally poured blue Gatorade on me after we had sex and said "good game" all over my white sheets
I wanna eat mushrooms and cuddle with a million dogs at once. I wanna know what heaven is like
He fucks strippers and doesn’t have a life plan. Of course I’m going to regret this
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