names aren't important. just tell him all you want is a lil make out sesh and keep it moving.
She forgot my birthday again. How do you forget something that came out of your vagina???
He told me something must be wrong, because no one had seen my boobs yet
It'll be just me and my penis against the world.
I just noticed my teeth are no longer straight. Wondering if anyone had an explanation.
Btw, I'm creating an event on fb to celebrate the one yr anniversary since we went to jail.
That just sounds like a recipe for sex in my backyard. Yes.
K, so let's go ahead and say that mcnugget and margarita Tuesday was a bad idea
Just got caught staring at a woman breast feeding. My only response was, "She's so adorable".
That hot guy i showed you guessed my exact bra size. I want to have his tan babies.
My usual answer of have sex with it doesn't work in this situation
YOU ARE THE WORST TRAVEL AGENT! THIS IS A SINGLES CRUSE FOR SENIORS. THEY ALL THINK IM THE FUCKING WAITRESS JUST CAUSE IM BLACK!!!
I just bout myself an edible arrangement for myself and had it delivered to work. I even wrote myself a note. This is a new low for me.
She sent me a video of herself sitting in the car stone faced listening to the Titanic song on silence. She won't answer my texts.
"I mean like shit happens" should never be an excuse for anything
Randomize