wake up i wanna do it froggy style
I hate this i feel like im wasting my youth here. I should be off hooking up with boys around the world and having awkward next morning convos in different languages!!
Joey just asked me if I ever got anything stuck in my vag.
was it embarrassing when you had to say yes?
Just scheduled a cocaine deal around my drug counsler appointment. Why yes, thank you, I do enjoy the irony that is my life.
Good to know: if a hot girls asks to go back to my place, she probably just needs to vomit all over my bathroom
There's three frat guys comparing how you were in bed. apparently you have gotten worse with time
we got cut off at 8 am. He spilled his drink three times on the plane. this should be one hell of a vegas trip
Sometimes crazy just comes naturally. I don't need booze to say that on occasion I feel the need to rip off my asshole and throw it against the fridge to see if it sticks.
That super awesome moment when the guy who threw up in your bed last night crawls into your roommate's bed the next morning...Naked...She was in it.
I really want some funfetti cake but I feel like its more socially acceptable to go out and drink
Sincerely. Thanks. You could have thought of anyone sitting on your face but you chose me. :)
yup and then I snapped out of it and realized I was playing beer pong against a 4 year old... and losing
She had sex with a starfish painted on her face. Thank you Halloween
ready for a night of bad decisions, horrible moral standards, and an unhealthy amount of illegal substances.
I deleted your number after I found out you gave my brother head for drugs.
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