We were doing it doggy style, and I puked on the floor and started crying, he told me it was okay his cat would eat it... and if it would make me feel better we could do anal...
And they lived happily ever after....
I think you're the first person to ever call Louisville, KY a "romantic getaway".
Well for one thing, she was eating rice with a shot glass.
For some reason fuck navy didn't go over quite as well as say fuck michigan;
we were pretty classy up until the second keg
He told us that was the only place he could get service when we found him in the closet passed out with a beer
he broke up with me while standing outside, half naked, waiting to fuck him. i feel like a leper right about now.
Update: I just puked into a sock. It was the only thing available at the time. Why I happened to be holding a sock, we may never know.
5am is far to early to be on jagerbomb number 6 right now
got high to the hills theme song. FEEL THE RAIN ON YOUR SKIN. no regrets.
So the stripper who poured a beer on my head also gives great head. Even she doesn't know why she went home with me. No more mystery shot challenges.
Might as well permanently tattoo lush somewhere on my body and show it to people when I decide to drink so they won't serve me.
I had sex on the roof of the dorm last night ... I feel like a combination of spiderman and van wilder
I saw a kitty kat get finger blasted on the couch by a Bulls player
The homeless woman that called me a "dirty looking cunt" the other day, was standing outside Starbucks today with a sign that said "Jesus loves you."
Randomize
