honestly, who buys weed with an unemployment check?
you.
oh yeah. preciate
Every time he makes fun of me for anything I just remind myself he ate ice cream out of a strippers vagina
I love seeing the creepers that friend request me outside of facebook. its like seeing a unicorn in the middle of campus.
I am standing at the lion i publicly humped last night. i am mortified.
well i did drunkenly flip his snowmobile going 90, so i can kind of see why hes mad
They sext over her pic comments. Role playing as wolves.
let's be real here, you have a beautiful vagina. this kid is a doctors son. that's a remedy for beautiful rich grandkids. he is just trying water his family tree, and make sure he doesn't end up in some piece of shit adult home. go for it.
I'm pretty sure they had a hash wedding cake. I love college weddings.
I vaguely remember having a 'grass is greener' conversation about our nipples. Dream or beautiful reality?
Beautiful, beautiful reality
Just saw Santa sitting on a restaurant patio drinking beer and using his free hand to gesture to cars that he's watching them
He used the panoramic camera on his iPhone to take a picture of his dick. And it actually filled it. Pretty sure I just came.
I'm having a hard time eating my sandwich knowing how many different buttholes my hands were in last night.
Have you heard yourself have sex?
I'm not THAT loud...
My neighbors filed a noise complaint.
You faceplanted on the railroad tracks and when I tried to tell you to get up, you told me you were "taking a quick breather"
Btw, apparently no one knows who ordered the pizzas for the after party, no one paid, and the delivery lady made a celeb shot, took a beer, then said she'd be back later to finish up the game...
Randomize
