It was awkward until we both realized our obsessions with harry potter and sangrias were the same. Now were in love.
You need tk get a life and stop texting me about fictional characters. I don't give a shit.
The karaoke bar doesnt have electric avenue. Ill just have to pick another song and sing the lyrics to electric avenue
I remember asking you "need some dick tonite?"
Yeah I guess to me frat party equals penis party. oh the wonders of vodka.
watching law and order svu marathons. all of the sex crimes cases start like my sat night.
my feelings for you are synonymous with those of a grizzly bear and salmon. i don't want to nom on you; but i need you to survive
We started playin just the tip, then shit got crazy
he just sent me a picture of his penis sticking through a piece of paper that he had drawn a stick figure with tits on it that said "you"
Some kids in a school bus just saw me jacking off in my car. This is how 89% of children find out about sex.
What section do you want to sit in? The screaming girls section or the "when you guys were popular I was straight and pretended not to like you guys" section?
lesbians are really intense tho, she made me take her eye makeup off and told me she was going to eat me for breakfast
Please tell your sister I apologize about saying her baby may have beef curtains. That was inappropriate.
I came home braless and wearing a tail....
This friendship isnt goin to work if you dont respond to my drunk texts
Lunch date was a success. And you'll be proud- my legs stayed closed.
eveytime i go to his house my cute clothes always get taken off what's the point of even wearing them there?
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