I woke up and my panties were thumbtacked to his wall. Out of my reach.
Should I feel badly because I just bought a really hot pregnant girl a drink after I lit her cigarette?
we were frolicking through a fountain of pizza rolls. it was like the best dream i ever had
I am growing concerned with the number of people here in cowboy hats
We were gonna play Truth or Dare but like 10 minutes in we decided to get naked and play Dare or Get the fuck out.
He was a bulldog and my face was like rare meat. Never again with the drunken ones.
I think i morst likely have 95 %patulas for hands and probably i also went to eGypt with so manyfriends. We laids in the sarcaphoguses.
You sound pretty unsure about all of this.
I have no idea what that means but I'm googling things just so I can watch my thumbs move
I woke up to him "wax on, wax off"-ing my boobs. I just reminded myself that I love him and let it happen.
Accomplishment of the day: changing my tampon at 38,000 ft with turbulence. Fasten seatbelt sign was definitely on.
I woke up on my girls floor with a pound of muenster cheese in my shirt pocket
Don't worry you weren't as drunk as you thought. You only fell 4 times.
2015 is the year I FINALLY ALMOST had enough dick to satisfy me.
For someone who wanted a break I'm getting way to much dick
He is a beautiful butterfly covered in tattoos and naked.
Randomize
