Seeya bye Latvian government! Whammy!
I know you are passed out now but when you wake up in the morning your keys are in the freezer and your probly gunna want to apologize to your gf...
i've come to the conclusion that there is no classy way to apply chloroseptic spray to your butthole.
she was puking into the toilet drowning herself saying "its okay im a swimmer"
If we have to be apart I understand. Being separated is probably best for our relationship now. I look forward to our booty calls.
Woke up with an epic boner today, the kind where you can spin books and shit on it. FYI: don't try spinning an encyclopedia
and she was grinding on the wall, purring at guys she liked at the pregame...
I get credit on the assist, you can thank me by taking a pic of her ass under the covers and sending it to me. It would make my YEAR
He thinks he's a sex addict. Just. My. Type.
The light burnt out and he thinks the power is out in the whole house. He is cooking a hog dog over two candles. I'm gonna see if he'll make me one
So, seriously. How does it feel to know that you're riding a cock that was in kindergarten when you were going to prom?
But I don't wanna live with them bc I need to be able to walk around naked and sex on any surface guilt free.
If y'all wanna know how far the apple fell from the tree I'm sexting during Easter service. Mom would be so proud 😳
just answer this one ? for me. why is there human shit in my shower right now?
Grandma said I got a good handjob. I think she meant manicure.
Randomize
