Just saw an old lady trip and stumble. Laughed. Kept Driving. I'm going to hell.
Only girl at that party wearing a fake beard and I STILL get laid...
i just realized i put more money and effort into 420 then i did for christmas
Too many people are naked here for this to be normal.
Correct me if I'm wrong here... but did we serenade each others breasts to "winds of change" last night?
The lifeguard told us we had to move Mike before the tide came in when he passed out.
czant get you from the arport. sry i found the rum. dan sucks at rumpong jusrt so yo knoqw.
You wouldn't be the first friend to shit himself in the last 7 days
He's afraid of heights. How do I know, you ask? Blowjob on his roof.
Definitely need to find a less healthy bootycalls. All this bitch got in her fridge is feta, English muffins and wheat grass. What the fuck can I make with that???
Found 2 Coors, problem solved.
Based off the amount of cat hair on my poncho....i stole a cat last night.
Exotic beer tasting at my apt right now and by that I mean I bought random beer and I'm drinking it on my balcony
My hot gay tattoo artist grew a beard and I'm not taking it well.
I just had mom give me advice about how and where to store my lube in my shower. It was super awkward. Of course, she also walked in on me masturbating once so I guess turnabout is fair play
shots, cocks, socks. bingo
Randomize
