Goodnight sugar queer
Sugar queer??
Why does my predictive text prioritize 'queer' over 'puffs'?
Came home and the girl was sitting on the steps "talking" on her ipod touch AND was halfway done eating a raw cucumber.
You have more facebook pictures than most towns have people.
So, Southern Comfort will donate 25 cents for every bottle sold towards Gulf Coast Relief... Can we save the wetlands through my alcoholism?
She threw her promise ring on the ground, that's when the freak came out.
Why are you speaking in third person?
Because I'm so hungover that I don't even want to be myself anymore.
OHMYGOD did I try to use pinesol as a mixer?
I remember trying to cut the power to a house I thought was "too bright to understand the meaning of christmas". Pretty sure I blacked out down the street.
I'm gonna do some tripping... In the direction of balls
pretty sure I just came the closest to throwing up in my pants that I'm ever gonna get. I'd like to thank the academy and the hangover thatt I hope actually kills me in the morning.
My roommate was being an ass so I put everyone's drinks/shots on his tab for the entire night. Then when we left he was telling me how he got out cheaper than last time.
Oddly enough I feel totally fine now. Clonazapam and red bull the breakfast of champions.
I just want to braid flowers into his hair and steal all of his pills.
We broke my graduation cords last night when we used them to tie each other up during sex last night
Haha. I found pics last week of me getting motorboated by a girl while i was taking a shot. Hahaha in my wedding dress. Classy
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