I don't get it.
Me neither.
But I masturbated to it anyway.
you're like a bully in the Christmas story
Sundresses, hats, and big glasses. That is the greatest trick the devil ever taught women.
The bender is in full force. After 2 bloody mary's at breakfast we are now drinking vodka redbull "as a precaution" so we will stay awake for the club tonight.
My dad walked in on me masturbating in my own apartment.....my own apartment!!
I found the perfect eye liner, it passed the blow job test, no smudging!!
I was making out with him, and then his friend randomly took off my pants and started going down on me. My first semi-threesome was a success.
She's crying about either her ex boyfriend, her one night stand, or her own puke. None of those is worth the tears.
She tried to beat him up using a half gallon of Bacardi, instead she got tangled in Kayla's hanging bra and broke a lamp. She can party with us anytime.
Just found dollar bills in my sheets. What part of the weekend am I forgetting?
I'm a 23 year old adult who just ordered condoms online from Target because I'm still too embarrassed to buy them in the store.
"I'm not drinking any more tonight." As I dipped my quesadilla in a shot of tequila....then eats it
I literally stopped banging her when my ESPN app alerted me that the Spurs had won. That's how much I hate Lebron. I would rather watch him cry in the post game interviews than get it in
I thought I'd never say this, but if I had to choose between these cookies and sex, it would be these cookies
Hypothetical question: Would it be wrong to tell the annoying children who don't listen to their parents that the motel is haunted?
Randomize
