and that's why we call him explosion in my pants. no one remembers his real name.
Is it really that bad? I heard it was like pooping. I like pooping.
I'll show rhose boucners: You don't let me in, I poop on your pool.
he drunkenly pissed himself on the deck, in the bathroom, and on my couch within the span of an hour
its like an avodart commercial...maybe he has a growing problem
Walk of Shame today included voting.
The last thing I remembered was laying in the bathtub fully clothed with the shower running while he was picking grilled cheese out of my hair. I couldn't figure out if i was more upset about being soaking wet or the fact that my grilled cheese was in my hair instead of my mouth.
And my cat won't make me food. She's a bitch
1. Are there men involved 2. Is there food involved 3. Do I have to put pants on 4. Do I have to leave this bed
I found you in the bathroom. You were sitting cross-legged on the floor wearing nothing but socks completely surrounded by broken crayons.
What could go wrong? i could have a mental breakdown with a bottle of champagne hand cuffed to a frat bro
The one that slept in my truck and you peed in his face?
My fart just smelled like the inside of white castle, I mean spot on, no difference whatsoever.
The guy next to me on the bus has one hole in his jeans that has over 20 mini dicks drawn on his leg. Classic.
you scattered cereal all over the floor so you could "re-trace your steps and figure out what happened." 20 min later you yelled about the mess and let the dog in to clean it up. 5 min after that you screamed since the cereal was gone. you suspected me and locked me in the bathroom so i could "think about what i'd done"
and you bit everyone who tried to let me out. no more tequila for you. EVER.
I'm unsure if I could pee myself at this point in my life
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