Let's just have a brief moment of silence for my dignity before we start tonight
how do you tell a roommate that having sex on your bottom bunk is not appropriate even if she has a top bunk that's hard to climb to?
Whatever you do to me, stop, I found yet another blonde hair in my asshole.
I've spent the last three hours watching 30 rock and eating marshmallows and ham. I'm considering taking up weed to justify my lifestyle.
i just remember pinky promising you guys to take care of him.
I don't think everyone found it as funny as I did... Nothing says "Party's Over" like the sound of a pump action shotgun.
Because I can't get laid, I'm day-drinking and hunting squirrels in the backyard. You can take the girl out of Montana...
Final Summary: could he eat a lit sparkler? Probably. Could he do it while peeing off the roof? I'll tell you when you get to the ER.
She had pubes that could make an episode of Duck Dynasty. Fear the Vag Beard
Another development in my life...I think I pulled a muscle in my neck from vomiting this weekend.
i don't know man... i just want to listen to John Lennon every time i finish fucking her. is this love?
Some small part of me hopes I'm on the probationary list because of seeing the Dean at that fetish party.
I'm taking pictures of my asshole to send to my boss. This is not what I had in mind the day after thanksgiving.
You have a full penis tattoo of a cobra fighting a mongoose, don't you?
this kid sitting diagonally in front of me is searching "cheap bongs" on google. hahahhaaha. who does this kid think he is?
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