matts gf stood and watched my naked ass gather my clothes off his floor this morning. sweet.
The more I throw up, the more I am remembering exactly what I drank last night...in order.
I just saw a kid drop his lollipop on the floor of best buy, kick it because he was pissed off and then pick it up and eat it. I think I have a long lost son.
we fucked while he was on the clock. He didnt even take off his bullet proof vest. Dont tell me thats not bad ass.
Were driving two hours to st louis so we can pee on the arch. See you in the morning. I might be sober by then.
successfully started a charcoal grill with 2 shots of everclear and some aluminum foil. i never wanna leave here
I mean, how many people can say they helped surgically remove something from their body? Other than the guy that got his hand stuck under a rock and cut it off. Doesn't count
Min and u sung xhionubjs. Cause that's what u kiij like a xhionunk
Im just using you for your dick and your superb survival skills if needed.
What drugs are we doing when you visit?
The correct answer is all the drugs because I just found out they have glow in the dark bubbles.
Did I tell you I bit someone's arm for you last night
They have a house rule that you get a composite for every 5 guys you sleep with. Where should I hang my new one?
I don't know what to do about my nipple.
I'm glad we smoked together,that was probs the biggest sibling bonding we will ever have.
I feel like my entire body is ashamed of me today
You're a god amongst men today
Randomize
